6.2 "The fight against pedophilia" and emotional disorders

6.2 "The fight against pedophilia" and emotional disorders 

Here I'll start with a Polish scandalous "fight against pedophilia" spot, which appeared during the creation of this campaign. It was a little girl with an undressed doll, who suddenly started to dress her up as if her life depended on it... -It was even soaked with such extreme negativity in the sense of emotional perception, and finally, to sum up this sick projection, "an evil touch hurts all life".

I remember watching it, I had enough - I felt despondent and as if I felt the dirt perversely, to the limit of the twisted fear pumped into this spot. In such situations, I resorted to masturbation, but not in order to imagine this or other girl, but in order to shed the stigma of the emotional dirt that this campaign entailed... -secondly to keep the rest from going crazy...

And what was this sick spot supposed to bring, what did it give good to anyone, what problem did it solve? Because I only see problems caused by it, not solved. Certainly it wasn't only me who caused such an extremely negative experience. But (also for sure) unfortunately, not everyone reacted as I did, and I would bet that even if I did not take into account all the rest of this pumped-up hatred and fear into pedophilia, it is just this spot caused many sexually harmed children on its conscience.

However, years of social alienation have finally made me immune to such things. That's why I don't expect any compassion or anything like that from you. But if I, a teenager at the time, saw it and experienced something like that, then what did little children experience? Can you imagine that feeling of threat, crushing their little throats, that incomprehensible fear and shame that seeps into their innocent souls? -I think something like this is emotional sexual harassment and should be punished!

There are also many situations where people are afraid for their children in the context of the possibility of using them. I suppose I myself was the reason for such fear of the father of my cute neighbour, whose beauty I considered perfect. When I saw her for the first time, she delighted me so much that I didn't control my way of looking at her, which exposed me to her family and brought me a lot of fear (each time I met her) and suffering in general.

And yet it didn't have to look like that - I could have a cordial relationship with her, like a neighbour with a neighbour; then I would smile and greet her without fear, and she wouldn't become the reason for my obsession. In such a situation, her father would certainly not have to worry about her in my context. I also think it wouldn't hurt at all if I told her that she's gorgeous, that I'm delighted with her appearance. (for a few years to tell her that - it was my greatest dream...) What hasn't only destroyed me and maybe not only me those years? -It was "fight against pedophilia." {*}

{*This is what I'm describing in detail at the end in "My Greatest Love".}